Answer: our adorable 5 year old.
Being at school full time now is bringing more changes in Missy's behaviour. Also, as the days go by we are getting to know and understand her just that bit better and the main issue we can see is control. She is very happy to help me but hates us helping her eg putting her clothes on, cutting up food, playing with toys. Hates it with a capital H. This morning we had a full on tantrum with her demanding I didn't touch her, until Daddy came upstairs to see what the shouting was all about it and explain that the neighbours could hear. A minute later she's fine. So, we have another catch up meeting with our social worker and family finding social worker tomorrow and I will find out what support they can offer to help us with the control issue.
Yesterday we had our Adoption Review with Missy's social worker, the Independent Reviewer and the family finding social worker. All are happy with progress so far and we have agreed no more visits to see the foster carer, although FC will be asked to send a few postcards over the next few months as part of the separation and loss treatment.
I had coffee yesterday with one of my best friends who also happens to be an adopter of nearly 11 years and her advice is always extremely welcome. Actually I nearly burst into tears in the cafe before she arrived as I think I was so relieved just to be able to talk to someone who had been there. I didn't though.
So, I've been collecting Missy after school and I know this is stressing me out believe it or not. I'm actually quite a shy person and in some situations find it hard to chat to people. A lot of the mums know each other already from when their child was in nursery, but I'm sure in time I'll get to know some. Daddy on the other hand has made a friend - turns out the dad of one of Missy's classmates was at Daddy's work a few days ago.
Right, things to do - I need to do through the Adoption Support Plan again in readiness for tomorrow's meeting and see what was promised to us. Plus I need to register Missy at the local GP. I rang them this morning and the lady I spoke to said they had nothing on file about her even though a letter was sent to them from Missy's SW with some reports. Not a good start. After much searching, turns out it's under my file. Plus, I need to get ingredients ready for Oat & Fruit Bars that we are making when she gets home.
Oh I'm with you on the school thing. Thankfully I know a few mums from pre-school but not many of Katie's friends have gone to her school so I've had to get in there and talk to people. I wrote a blog post a while ago about infiltrating toddler groups - much of the stuff in there might be useful for school as well. Our SW told us that you have to be on a mission to make play dates. I'm fairly shy and find it hard to approach people but since having Katie I get in there and talk to everyone. We've built up a good support network and have lots of playdates now. We also learned the benefit of having a large birthday party and inviting everyone you want her to be friends with - it works!! Here's the link http://www.our-adoption-story.blogspot.co.uk/2012/02/mission-possible-infiltrating.html
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