Tuesday 1 April 2014

A weekend of celebration

Well, that went remarkably smoothly considering the anxiety-laden, verbal and physical abuse-laden build up.

Last week we finally had our Celebration Hearing. Finally, we are officially a family.  Its taken a while, mainly because it took us time to feel right about putting in the paperwork, but here we are.

The courtroom was smaller than I had imagined and I smiled slightly when I heard the words "All rise". I've heard it so so many times on TV and here we were standing in front of a judge, in his full robes and wig. He was great, very smiley and instantly put Missy at ease. He invited her up to the bench, invited her to sit in his big chair and put his wig on her. I could see her anxiety almost melting away. She loved being centre of attention in her new rainbow coloured summer dress.  She answered all his questions and both posed happily for photographs.  My Mum plus Daddy's Mum, sister and her partner came with us too.

Afterwards, we all went for brunch at a nearby restaurant where Missy had the largest plate of American style pancakes, ice cream and raspberries she's ever seen!

The next day we had permission to take Missy out of school and so we went down to the south coast where we stayed for one night in a youth hostel.  This brought back great memories for me of when I went backpacking many years ago.  Oh the freedom!  Missy bagged the top bunk which was always my favourite too.  I always felt safe up there, looking down on who was coming into the room.

The next day we headed to the beach, spent time on the pier, looked round the shops and back to the beach for fish and chips and ice cream.  Well, what else would you eat on the beach!   One day I would love to live by the coast.

The next day (phew, I'm exhausted just writing about it), it was Mothers Day.   Missy had been so excited by it and had written me a beautiful poem plus made a gorgeous card and a wall hanging at school (actually I had these on Wednesday as she couldn't wait).  Daddy has also bought a card from the shops for her to give to me and she gave me a Paul Hollywood cook book, which she chose all by herself.  Plus lots of gorgeous flowers too.

We then headed out to a place I wanted to visit in the morning and in the afternoon went ice skating as Missy has seen it on the Winter Olympics and really wanted to give it a go.

Now, imagine a baby giraffe after it's just been born, wobbly with legs all over the place.  That was Missy, clinging to the side for dear life.  Smiling with it though.  Daddy was also a bit wobbly as he hadn't been ice skating for 30 years!  I'd had a few lessons five years ago but really all I can do is skate round and just about go backwards.  Missy spent more time on her bottom than on her feet but gradually she became more confident and took some advice from a steward who helped her along (of course, wouldn't listen to me or Daddy). By the end of the 90 minutes she was managing five metres or so by herself - more stepping than gliding but a good start nonetheless.

And then home. To rest.

What an exhausting weekend and maybe we did pack quite a lot in as Daddy and I were certainly exhausted. Missy really did enjoy herself and I'm really proud of her because it was a huge event, the enormity of which I'm not entirely sure she'll understand for a few years.

Apart from a few tantrums over food (as always) Missy had a thoroughly good weekend. Hurrah! A certain level of anxiety seems to have lifted from her.  The judge was a nice man after all - so nice that she now wants to be a judge (I think it was the purple robe that's swayed her). She's still an anxious little girl of course - food will long be an issue plus she's exhibiting separation anxiety this morning as she didn't want Daddy to go to work and I'm out all day on Thursday at a family member's funeral.

And so, onwards, to the next stage of our journey.


  1. Reading your blog, it seems like it was just yesterday when you were worrying about the paper work, the meetings with the social workers and the hearings. But now, you’re officially a family. Congratulations! It’s really worth celebrating! I hope everything else works out just fine, like her anxiety and food issues.

    Dean, AdoptionNetwork.com

    1. Thanks Dean. Yes, the months certainly whizz by. I think we have a long way to go with her anxiety and food issues but I my hope is that over time (months, years maybe) these issues can reduce.


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