Thursday 9 October 2014

Monkey Business

Well it's been a while since I've updated my blog. Sorry blog to have ignored you but I've been feeling quite 'meh' lately.

The summer holidays were great and the two weeks when Daddy was off were two of the best weeks we've had in the last two years, so we are planning on doing exactly the same next year. But then school started and Missy's anxiety ramped up. Her attitude changed, she refused to do things, was rude, same old, same old.

Usually the Autumn term for me is also a time for change and new things but this year I just haven't felt like that, I've just felt flat again. However, I've recently found out I'm seriously anaemic so that no doubt contributes to my lack of energy. I'm on iron tablets now. I've also found out that my cholesterol level is high - no surprise as my diet as been crap over the last couple of years and I haven't been able to run, plus it looks highly likely its genetic - so to help lower the levels I'm taking Co-enzyme Q10 which is also good for boosting energy levels. So, hopefully in a few months time my energy will be topped up and I'll be full steam ahead.

After a few weeks of being back at school, Missy came home with the class mascot. I didn't even realise they had one, I thought it was just Nursery, Reception and Year 1.  Now, obviously it was lovely for Missy to be recognised by the teacher for doing something well and therefore receiving the mascot, a monkey.  However, whilst in earlier classes she only had the mascot for a night or, if lucky, at the weekend, this year they get to keep the mascot for a whole week! Monkey went everywhere with her; in bed, swimming, a party. She got very attached to the monkey, too attached.  But I couldn't do anything, I couldn't tell her to take it back. I knew there would be fall out.

The night before she had to take the toy back in, she got very upset at the thought of having to part with monkey and the next morning she sobbed all the way too school. Even her friends in the playground couldn't cheer her up and she stuck by me whilst we waited for her teacher to open the classroom door.  When the door was opened, she walked in crying her eyes out.  One of the TAs asked what was wrong and Missy replied that she didn't want to give monkey back.  "Oh, don't be silly", said the TA dismissively.  I took a deep breath.   By this time Missy was sobbing uncontrollably.  Thankfully her teacher is empathetic. I don't how much she knows about attachment but she seemed to handle it fairly well, immediately seeing that Missy was upset and taking her aside.  I like her Year 2 teacher, she has time for me and has already put in place a couple of things to help Missy.

Three weeks later and Missy is still getting upset every now and then about not having monkey. She can't accept that it's only fair monkey is shared around the whole class, of course she can't.  All she can think about is the loss. I think I'll have to ask her teacher  not to give the monkey to Missy again, but recognise her in other ways that build her self-esteem.  No surprises what's top of her list from Santa. Do Toys R Us sell monkeys?



2 comments:

  1. "Oh don't be silly!" I can't bear these frequently heard words. I am sure they have never, ever had the desired effect on a child. Only worsened the situation.

    Hope you find a very lovely monkey for your daughter.

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  2. That's very harsh of the TA and dismissive too. Horrid. And similar to Mini's teacher recently telling him not to be so silly - Mummy always picked him up so he had nothing to worry about. *sighs* - they just don't think do they?

    Hope you manage to find a lovely monkey for Missy (incidentally there is a talking monkey called Dave that you can sit on your shoulder...)

    Thanks for linking to #WASO x

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